Flat Corbett

Last weekend, the Scranton Times-Tribune's Chris Kelly had another great satirical column on our illustrious Governor Tom Corbett. Great stuff, but when I saw this creation, Flat Corbett, I knew I had to share.

The idea stems from that Elementary School project known as Flat Stanley. A paper cut out of "Stanley" is mailed to various parts of the world and is photographed - beside the Eiffel Tower, on the Great Wall of China, you get the idea. Kids learn about world places without ever going there. The idea has grown, and now people photograph themselves with a Flat Stanley when they travel.

Enter Flat Corbett. Folks all around NEPA who dislike some of our governor's lame policies can print out an image of His Flatness. They can then send in photos showing places and people he's affected without ever traveling around to see the damage he's done.

One policy that rubs me raw is his agreement to not tax Marcellus Shale drilling companies. These companies want what we have. Common sense business says 'we're in the driver's seat- hold out for a good deal.' Did Corbett do that? No, he threw open the doors to the state and said "Go forth and drill." Now the road in front of my house has 30 or more of these water trucks twice a day, every day.

It's more like the Jersey Turnpike than rural Pennsylvania. Our roads weren't designed for those kind of loads and now literally the edges of the road are sagging. Come on, Corbett. If these companies drill and dig and tear down forests to lay pipeline,

they ought to pay for the damage they're causing. Since they're making a fortune off our lands' resources, why shouldn't they pay into our financially strapped school systems?

So I printed out my Flat Corbett. It won't be hard to find places to use him.